Hello

It's been a few days since I've been able to post. We have been "offline" for several days, but I'm back now. Things are going ok around here. My healing is going a little slower than I would like, but it's trucking along. Every day I feel a little bit better in one area, but still having trouble with others. Healing is for the birds. I'm tired of being on pain medications, so I try to get away with not taking it, but after a short while, I have to take more, just so I am at least minimally functional. I'm trying to do a little bit more when I'm able to, I'm washing and drying laundry now, just having trouble with the folding and putting away part. Mark has been carrying a big burden with working, trying to get our house ready sell, taking care of the kids, the housework and me. I feel bad that he is having to work so hard, he deserves a vacation. He doesn't complain at all though. I wish there was a way other than words to tell him how much I appreciate him. He's such a good man, I'm so blessed. I love him more than I've ever loved anyone in my life. I really feel blessed to have a husband like him, there seem to be so few men like him.

I'm getting eager to move. I'm ready for a change in my life. I'm ready for a slower pace, and to be a tighter knit family with my inlaws, who are really great people and wonderful support. We'll be living with Mark's parents for a year to a year and a half while we are developing their 2 1/2 acre parcel of land that's attatched to thiers. While it won't be "ours" it will be cheap living and when they are ready to retire, we can either purchase the land from them, or we'll get profits from the sale, so in the end it's a win win situation for all parties involved. I really miss living in Washington close to friends, and close to Mark's family, which is a healthy family, unlike my own who lives down here. I need to separate myself and my children from all the unhealthiness that they are subjected to on a daily basis from my side of the family. I am so blessed to have married into a wonderful family. My mother in law calls me a "jewel". It makes me feel good to have her say such nice things about me. I don't really know how to put my thoughts into words as well as I would like, but the end game, is that I want to live my own life apart from my side of the family, with the support that I never received and will never receive from my crazy codependent family. I NEED to get away. I'm not "running" away, but I am I believe, doing what's in the best interest of my children and my marriage. And I want to do it. I WANT to be a good mother, and a closer family, and I WANT my children to have good examples and I WANT the back up and support in my choices that my inlaws give. I WANT to be parents like THEM! Not very many people can say that they had wonderful parents that did things right, and instilled good values in them, but my husband was blessed with EXACTLY that sort of family! Wow, that's powerful. What a good and wonderful God to have sent that family into my life! I want my children and thier husbands and wives to feel that way about me, and what better way to acheive that than to have a role model like them :)